Thursday, December 6, 2012

Ambiguous Facebook: Things that bug me the most.

102.5 FM All Things Social Morning Show transcripts October 10, 2012
Carl: Hello and welcome to the All Things Social morning show. We’ve been getting quite a bit of overwhelming response from our listeners on Facebook all looking for some help. We’ve decided to dedicate a whole morning show to this certain issue that is plaguing the people of America and beyond. Facebook has been growing in popularity. In fact, I have here a recent study that claims that people spend an average of 22 hours a day with ready access to their Facebook accounts, and that they check those accounts 15.8 times per hour. This surprised me because I and most of my associates have access to Facebook 24 hours a day. But another part of their study says that people spend the majority of these Facebook checks either trying to figure out their friend’s Facebook statuses, or trying to figure out how to word their own. This, folks, is what we are going to talk about today. Facebook status updates! How to interpret your friends’ status updates, and what to post on your own when you’ve got “status block.” Of course we can and will answer any other questions you have about this social network. You are welcome to call in! Let’s take some callers now. Hello Amanda! What can I help you with?
Amanda: Well, first off, thanks for having me on your show! I’m such a fan! And I totally agree with you, I spend way more than 22 hours on Facebook!
Carl: I know, I don’t know where they got only 22 hours from.
Amanda: They must have surveyed some of those people who make a Facebook account and then forget their passwords and are never ever on. Gosh, people like that are so annoying.
Carl: They are annoying. It’s like they are totally not interested in our lives.
Amanda: Exactly! So, anyway, here is my question: I have a lot of friends on Facebook, and most of them I don’t see on a regular basis. I mean, there’s people from elementary school that I don’t even remember, people I meet at parties that I never see again. You know. Now, if someone from my “close friends” list posts something weird I know what to think. But how do I respond when one of my “distant friends” post something weird?
Carl: Like what kind of weird? Give me an example.
Amanda: Like one of those friends posted “Why am I always so alone?” like, just an hour ago. I looked at his profile, he only has 150 friends, so I understand why he is lonely. I just haven’t seen him since kindergarten so I didn’t know if I should comment.
Carl: I can see what you mean. But it’s critical that you respond just to let him know that you are there. He sounds really lonely and, especially since he has only 150 friends, at least let him know that when he logs onto Facebook, he isn’t alone. Does that help answer your question, Amanda?
Amanda: Oh yes! Thanks so much!
Carl: I think it’s so sad when people have so few friends on their Facebook accounts. When I set up my account I had the goal to get 1000 friends, and I am almost there! Anyway, lets take another caller. Kevin! Welcome to the show! What can we do for you?
Kevin: Hey Carl! So, I have a problem. My wife hasn’t been talking to me for two days. Everything was fine until one night I came home from work and asked her how she was. She just glared at me and yelled at me to check her Facebook status. All it said was “Spent all day cleaning and the house looks fantastic! I love being so productive!”
Carl: Oh Kevin, how long have you been married.
Kevin: We are almost to our sixth anniversary.
Carl: Well, here is where you went wrong: Your wife doesn’t love being productive. Clearly you should have known that your wife wanted you to bring home flowers and maybe throw her a parade for cleaning your house. Then give her some money to go get a professional massage so that her back won’t hurt anymore.
Kevin: Her back hurts?
Carl: Of course it hurts. I’m looking at your wife’s Facebook page right now. Three months ago she posted that her back always hurts after cleaning the house.
Kevin: I forgot about that…. Wait. You’re looking at my wife’s Facebook page?
Carl: You know Kevin, you should really be more attentive. Alright, lets move onto the next caller. Wow these phones are ringing off the hook! Welcome to the show Marsha!
Marsha: Oh thank you! Oh, I’m so excited! I’m such a huge fan!
Carl: Well, thanks Marsha. What can I do for you.
Marsha: Well, its just that, see, I just don’t know what to do. I… I go through the whole day trying to come up with something to put as my Facebook status. I mean, I don’t want to come off the wrong way or , ya know, offend someone. I have a lot of opinionated friends. I just…. Should I be myself? Am I thinking about this way to hard? I can’t not post something. Yesterday’s post doesn’t apply for today. What if someone looks at my Facebook page and they think that it still applies?
Carl: I think that this is a legitimate fear! So many people rely on Facebook to stay updated with their friends, it would be a lie to NOT update at least every day. This survey that I have says that people update their statuses an average of 10 times in a day. It is so important to be honest in your Facebook status updates too. Marsha, maybe you could post something related to your feelings of not knowing what to write. Maybe something like “I just don’t know today” or even, if you wanted a cool effect you could revert to the old Facebook style and write “is so confused about this” even though Facebook hasn’t forced you to use your name in front of your status for years.
Marsha: Oh, Carl you make such great points. I always love and live by your advice! This conversation is so going on Facebook right now!
Carl: Thank you Marsha, for joining us on the All Things Social morning show. We are going to cut to some commercials, but keep your dial where it is, we will be back with more solutions to your Facebook conundrums!

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